Patricia Heaton is a Coward
Patricia Heaton, star of ABC’s The Middle, high-tailed it off of Twitter recently, presumably because she could not defend the nasty and misogynistic insults that she lobbed at Sandra Fluke. She also encouraged her “Tweatons” to lob at Ms. Fluke.
Unfortunately for her, in connection with one of my posts on Oink-Gate, I took a screenshot of her Twitter stream. Here it is:
Sorry, Patricia. You can run away from your words, but you cannot hide from them. The Internet is forever.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEVER SEE? NEOCON LEGISLATORS AND HEDGE FUND OPERATORS OPENLY ATTACKING THE TEA PARTY OR FUNDAMENTALIST CHRISTIANS OR ANY OF THE OTHER RADICAL CONSERVTIVE GROUPS THAT GRAB ALL THE HEADLINES. YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE NOTHING THEY’RE DOING HARMS THE OVERALL AGENDA OF DEREGULATION AND CORPORATE GREED. THEY USE THOSE PEOPLE TO EITHER BOLSTER THEIR NUMBERS OR DISTRACT FROM WHAT THEY’RE DOING AND IN THE END THEY ALWAYS GET WHAT THEY’RE AFTER.
LIBERALS AND SOCIAL JUSTICE ACTIVISTS SPEND ALMOST ALL OF THEIR TIME INFIGHTING AND BICKERING OVER WHOSE CAUSE IS MORE IMPORTANT OR WHO’S SAYING THINGS THE “RIGHT” WAY AND NOTHING EVER GETS ACCOMPLISHED. THEY ATTACK LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE WHO AREN’T HURTING THEIR CAUSES OR ARE AT LEAST HURTING THEM LESS THAN A MILLION OTHER ACTUAL THREATS BECAUSE ONLY LIKE-MINDED LIBERALS GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THOSE CAUSES AND PEOPLE IN THE FIRST PLACE. TELL THE AVERAGE OBAMA-HATING REDNECK TO CHECK HIS PRIVILEGE SOMETIME AND SEE WHERE IT GETS YOU. TELL THE BOARD AT BANK OF AMERICA THEY DON’T PAY ENOUGH ATTENTION TO PEOPLE OF COLOR WHEN THEY’RE SIPHONING A COUPLE BILLION FROM THE FED. YOU SEE MORE ANTI-O.W.S. LITERATURE FROM SOCIAL JUSTICE MAJORS THAN YOU DO FROM CONSERVATIVE NEWSPAPERS.
THE OCCUPY MOVEMENT ISN’T FIGHTING RACIAL DISCRIMINATION OR THE PATRIARCHY. THEY’RE FIGHTING RICH ASSHOLES WHO HAVE STOLEN MONEY FROM EVERYONE ELSE IN THE ENTIRE COUNTRY AND THE LAWMAKERS WHO HAVE HELPED THEM DO SO. OF COURSE FEMINIST AND MINORITY CAUSES ARE IMPORTANT, BUT INSTEAD OF LETTING O.W.S. FOCUS ON WHAT IT’S ABOUT, WHICH IS GETTING MONEY OUT OF POLITICS AND ENDING ECONOMIC DISPARITY IN AMERICA, IT’S EATEN FROM WITHIN BY PEOPLE IT WOULD BENEFIT, JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER THING “THE LEFT” TRIES TO ACCOMPLISH, BECAUSE “THE LEFT” CAN’T LEARN TO AGREE TO DISAGREE LONG ENOUGH TO ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING WHILE “THE RIGHT” JUST ROLLS ALONG MERRILY, GETTING WHAT IT WANTS IN BITS AND PIECES BY USING THE TOOLS (AKA PEOPLE) IT HAS AT HAND. I MEAN, JESUS, THE TEA PARTY PEOPLE WERE SITTING AROUND, UNINSURED, ARGUING AGAINST SOCIALIZED HEALTH CARE. THAT’S SOME AMAZING PUPPETEERING ON THE PART OF THOSE IN POWER, BUT ALSO SOMETHING WE MIGHT WANT TO THINK ABOUT. CAN THE BILLIONS OF LEFTIST SPLINTER GROUPS GO AGAINST THEIR OWN SELF-INTEREST LONG ENOUGH TO ACCOMPLISH A SINGLE UNIVERSALLY BENEFICIAL GOAL?
ONE STEP AT A TIME. USE THE ANGRY STRAIGHT WHITE PEOPLE TO GET THE MUCH SHITTIER STRAIGHT WHITE PEOPLE OUT OF POWER, THEN GO FROM THERE. IF THE MOVEMENT IS SUCCESSFUL THERE WILL BE LESS MONEY IN POLITICS FROM THE SUPER-RICH, ALLOWING ACTUAL PRODUCTIVE LEGISLATION TO PASS BECAUSE IT WON’T BE BEING INFLUENCED OR COCKBLOCKED BY THE ELITE. SURE, IT’S NOT INSTANT UTOPIA BUT IT’S BETTER THAN THE CURRENT SYSTEM, AND IT WOULD REPLACE PEOPLE WHO WILL NEVER GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THE ISSUES THAT AFFECT MINORITY GROUPS WITH PEOPLE WHO AT LEAST MIGHT.
MAYBE THE ANSWER ISN’T “SMASH THE STATE” BUT “CHIP AWAY AT THE STATE, STEADILY, PIECE BY PIECE, USING THE STATE AGAINST ITSELF, UNTIL WE HAVE A NEW STATE.” THAT’S HOW THEY BUILT IT, AFTER ALL. ONE BRICK AT A TIME.
… OR WE COULD JUST KEEP ARGUING WITH EACH OTHER. THAT SEEMS TO BE WORKING.
Who’s a pretty birdie? You are! Listen to your little chirpies!
I HOPE YOU AND THAT NAPKIN YOU CALL A SHIRT ARE TRAPPED IN A FIRE.
hashtags
I really love hashtags. They allow you to put an extra zinger into your comments. ex: When a politician references Pokemon on his quitting the run for POTUS you realize that you where right in the ninth grade when you contemplated telling you mom that she should buy stock in your weird obsession that she thought was a “phase”.
#gottatouchemall
You see!!! It’s a joke because not only is it true that Pokemon is still a huge success after 12 years but “gottatouchemall” is a play on gotta catch them all, the Pokemon catch phrase. Because Hermain Cain is a philandering perv and a lying liar that lies! You see?! Funny!
I BET JON HAMM FEELS LIKE CINDERBLOCKS WRAPPED IN VELVET.
I BET HIS STUBBLE IS LIKE STEEL WOOL.
I BET HE WOULD WOULD KISS MY CHIN WHEN THAT STUBBLE MADE IT ALL RED AND SORE, THEN TENDERLY MAKE LOVE TO ME ON A SOFT DOWN COMFORTER.
I BET HE HAS PSYCHIC POWERS AND THE STRENGTH OF A HEALTHY OX.
CAN YOU HEAR ME, JON? CAN YOU HEAR ME LOVING YOU?
… TAKE ME AWAY FROM HERE. TAKE ME ANYWHERE.
JUST TAKE ME. I AM YOUR SPECIAL LOVE DOLL.
DO I?
DO I SMELL LIKE JÄGERMEISTER?
WELL LET ME TELL YOU, CHRIS, THAT’S SHOCKING. I’M SHOCKED TO HEAR THAT. JUST KIDDING, OBVIOUSLY, SINCE ALL WE DID LAST NIGHT WAS DRINK A REPULSIVE AMOUNT OF JÄGERMEISTER. NICE TO SEE YOU MADE IT TO A SHOWER AT SOME POINT.
I WOKE UP IN A RANDOM VOLVO WITH A SET OF HOUSEKEYS THAT AREN’T MINE UNDER MY FACE, AND WHAT IS EITHER A PRETTY IMPRESSIVE AMOUNT OF CHOCOLATE SYRUP OR A FUCKING TON OF BLOOD ALL OVER MY PANTS.
I JUST WANT SOME WAFFLES, OKAY? NO QUESTIONS. NO JUDGEMENTS. JUST WAFFLES.
